Just as I was setting down to work on my first blog post today, I shut off any communication with my environment as my huge headphone firmly covered my ears. Apparently, I couldn’t hear anything around me until someone stood in front of me glaring in my direction. Of course, he had been frustrated with my lack of respond to his repetitive calling for me.What an irony to be writing my first blog post on effective communication skill. Yet I had been reprimanded for lack of conversing skills. Somehow, this incident allows me to reflect on how Communication encompasses a broad spectrum of things - the way in which we encode and decode messages, the communication channel chosen to send these messages, and how non-verbal communication cues involved like appearances and gestures, are just the tip of the iceberg (not after I had quite a handful of criticism from him).
In fact every moment in our life, as long as we come into physical or any other form of contact with another living organism, communication network had been established. A simple hug we give to our mum every morning sends a clear message – we care for each other. In many occasions, we communicate our love to our pet dogs as they savor the comfort from our stroking around their bellies or back. Everyday we picked the communication channel, and next come the messages we encoded into the channel. Effective communication has become so important in our daily life to maintain strong and healthy relationships with our friends and love ones.
No doubt in today’s society, holding a respectable qualification can be a powerful spring board to secure a new job. However one who arrogantly boast his exceptional achievement in
Perhaps an elegant flow of encoded message into the channel, follow by a beautiful decoding of the message leads to an effective communication. Sound perfect, but difficult to achieve because it takes strong effort to actively listen and empathy to respond tactfully.
Sometimes, opening a communication channel is just like taking a bitter pill because we need to take the initiative and courage to opens our psychological barrier against fear of negative feedback from the receiver. Therefore, communication involves taking risk and making attempts to open the door of somebody’s life. Reducing the risk by engaging ourselves actively in applying effective communication skills to break the icy barrier and eventually enters the warming heart of the receiving end. “The doors we opens and close each day decide the lives we live” – Flora Whittemore
hi patrick,
ReplyDeleteWhat a creative start of your very first post! I guess the person must be really mad at you for being ignored. I realise that such similar scenerios are always happening in our everyday life when we did not even notice it. The feeling of negligence is defintely not good when we try to engage the listener. Firstly, whether the listener is intentional or not, it sends you a message that you are not being respected. Secondly, the listener shows negative interests in your conversation which is not what we like.
Hence, listening with interest from the heart is especially crucial here for an effective conversation.
From your last paragraph, i like the point when you mentioned that it takes great courage for one to expect negative feedback when one opens up for a conversation. For instance, it takes great courage to criticise one person while enusuring that it is done in a considerate manner. Not many can do that especially if one would need to sound out his or her greviances. Next, talking to a group of people is also not an easy task to accomplish as we always need to maintain their level of attentiveness. Lastly, it is not easy to approach a person who tends to shut himself from the world such as people with autism. one may be dissappointed time and again from failure to engage the listener. Hence, persistence is the key.
Thank you, Patrick, for this detailed discussion. I like the way you start this with the (ironic) story. You also cover many aspects of communication as you deliberate on the need for and value of various comm skills. Finally, you present a key quote. This all adds up to a comprehensive effort, though at times it seems to lack focus.
ReplyDeleteHowever, rereading what you wrote after seeing the quote, I felt that using that earlier might have given your discussion just that: more focus.
Do you see what I mean?
Hi Patrick,
ReplyDeleteYour post is pretty insightful and I have gained quite a fair bit of knowledge regarding effective communication from your post. In fact, I have actually quoted one of your sentences in Rebecca's post. Hope you would not mind.
Your post highlights a few important points about the need for effective communication.I got two main ideas from your post. The first idea is that no matter how capable the person is, he/she can never be successful if he/she is unable to communicate effectively. The second idea is what I actually quoted in Rebecca's blog and that is we must be receptive to negative comments.
Thank you for sharing!
Hello Patrick! =)
ReplyDeleteI especially like the last paragraph of the blog post. It has given me an additional perceptive of communication. Communicating is indeed not an easy task for everyone. Self-confidence would definitely improve the chance of effective communication with others. This would go prefect with willingness to accept and learn from negative comments. (As mentioned by Xiu Ling)
You have mentioned that qualification alone is unable to benefit us much in our career. This is very true. This is further illustrated by Brad’s example in class on Obama being the president of United States. Emotional quotient is indeed as essential as intelligent quotient in life.
Thank you for the interesting blog post! =)
Hi Patrick,
ReplyDeleteI have a similar experience with the ear pieces incident too, although my parents were not so critical.
Recently, I heard an appreciation speech from a club president. From her, I learnt that a leader is only successful if her message is conveyed and perceived correctly. Even though she is stern, she is indeed very successful in leading the team.
Indeed, taking the first step is like taking a bitter pill and if the communication doesn't flow, it's going to be awkward. Nonetheless, someone has to take the intiative to break the ice. It is always nice to know more friends and make the ambience comfortable.
=D
~ Yuanhua ~